Patient: I have swallowed a key.

Sardar Doctor: When?

Patient: 3 months back!

Sardar Doctor: What were you doing till now?

Patient: I was using duplicate key, now I have lost it too.

Customer to waiter: Everyday you charge me money for a cup of coffee. How wonderful it would be if you serve me coffee free of cost today.

Waiter: Sir, everyday you drink coffee from a filled cup. How wonderful it would be if you drink from an empty cup today !!!